Sick.
To be honest, it's the main reason I haven't been blogging. (being too busy is only half the story) I didn't want the focus of "themarfarr" to be epilepsy. But that HAS BEEN SO MUCH of my life.. How do I leave it out?
See ya ... here or there :)
So sick of being sick.
I have had the flu 3 times this year. Averaging once a week so far in 2012. Awesome :P So far Kev's had it once, Halle and Drew each twice, and Dawson once. He is on my arm right now, still whimpering and moaning in his sleep. Poor little guy.
Anyway, between all that and cleaning up carpets and recleaning towells and bedding, I feel like I haven't done much else for a while.
Today I have that after-flu-belly-ache and general crummy achy shakiness. Trying to not over do it, I am laying here blogging. Trying to ignore the things I feel I should be getting done.
Anyway.
I have decided to start another blog. I want this blog to be our "regular" blog, full of family memories etc. The other blog will be for epilepsy; updates on the kids, a collection of inspiration I have found to keep me going, some memories of what we've been through already, but mainly just to vent. Sooo many times over the last few years when things have been particularly difficult, I have felt the need to write. It is so therapeutic. I sorta wish I would've kept it together in a blog years ago.
I feel like I need -for me- to keep the two blogs separate. I want to look back someday, read this blog and know that 1) we kept going even when it was tough. We still celebrated, spent time together and didn't focus or dramatize the hard stuff.
At the same time I need to know that 2) I wasn't afraid to talk about the hard stuff. I was real. We went through some really hard things. We faced them and came out stronger.
Finding the balance between these two things- Being upbeat and positive AND being real- has been quite the juggle this last year. I believe BOTH of them are crucial, and equal in importance. I don't know how well I always do with either but I sure as heck try my best.
Anyway right now I am heading over there. It'll prob take a while to end up looking how I'd like it but if you feel like checking it out, head over to
www.weloveitanyway.blogspot.com